Category Archives: Miscellanea

Whatever doesn’t fit exactly in the other categories.

The truth of it is …

 

You may have noticed I am not keeping to my blogging schedule very well of late. I have been trying to dig in and get to it, but it’s just not happening as easily.

The truth of it is …

I am getting more and more pulled down,

feeling as if I’m shutting down,

withdrawing,

while at the same time I am trying to keep going.

So very tired.

I feel joyless .. although my joy comes from – and is – HIM (the Lord), I feel joyless ..

as if the music has left me (I rarely sing and I used to sing or hum aloud or in my head almost all the time)

and the light has turned to shadow.

I feel trapped and closed off and … emptying,

being drained of my spark.

My life is looking gray again … and that hasn’t been for a very long time.

I miss laughter …

real, deep-down, belly-aching laughter …

that comes from delight,

joy,

happiness,

heart songs

and all that is beautiful.

So, the truth of it is, I am depressed. (The fact that I had a birthday Sunday had nothing to do with it, either.)

And yes, I know I mentioned it before, but this is not just going away and has instead been increasing. Even so, I have tried to not let it show and therefore most people likely wouldn’t realize it.

The positive thing is I am getting help from my naturopath and reflexologist. I am not going under, and they will help see to it that I don’t. If I find it too hard to manage until my next scheduled appointment I am to let them know. And I will. There is no way I am going back into the dark, tormented depths of despair I experienced several years ago. It’s been an uphill struggle sometimes to not fall back there, but I have come through and I will again. 

Why am I telling you this? Because I want you to know I am trying. I am reading when I can get myself to do so, and right now I actually have two books on the go. I’m also still plodding along with PiBoIdMo, coming up with ideas for stories for picture books. Our challenge is to think up 30 ideas, one a day for all of November, but today (day 17) I added idea #24 to my list. So, you see, I am trying to keep my brain working through the sometimes foggy days, and the low mental energy, the fatigue, the sadness, the feelings of wanting to retreat into my hidey-hole/safe place.

It’s discouraging to not be able to do all I want to do, all I have committed to do, all I feel I should be doing. Add that into the struggle and it becomes even more difficult to pull out of it, so I’m having to remind myself to not listen to every negative thought.

This won’t last forever, thankfully.

In the meantime, I thank you for your patience and understanding.

With what do you struggle in your daily life? What do you tell yourself to keep positive?

Thanks for reading, and … Creative Musings! :)

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Lest We Forget

Remembrance Day, November 11.

LEST WE FORGET

 

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Do you expect rewards? Watch this moving video.

The video I am sharing with you today actually brought tears to my eyes.  How often do we expect recognition for the things we do for others when the better thing is to simply be kind and thoughtful with no expectation of reward? Just knowing someone has been blessed through us should be its own reward.

Perhaps this video is food for thought.

Do you have anything to share about something good that came from your kindness? Perhaps you like to do kind things anonymously?

Thanks for reading, and … Creative Musings!  :)

Illustrator contributes his talent for children with cancer!

There’s always something, isn’t there? :)  I finally finished the book I was reading and was going to get a review ready when I discovered I’d lost my internet connection. Repairs were being done on the tower after something went wrong following the weekend’s stormy weather, I was told. When all was restored I didn’t get back to my computer at a decent time to prepare the review.

I am scheduling this post for Thursday morning. Since on that day I am going to be participating in a Dementia Strategy in the city (an hour away) I’m not staying up late tonight (Wednesday) to work on my review. I’m very tired, trying to stay ahead of depression and not doing very well at it, and making myself go to some things so I don’t crawl under a rock to hide. (I’d really rather hide.) Besides that, October 30 is my husband’s and my anniversary, so we are meeting after the strategy and his work day to go out to dinner somewhere before coming back home.

What I decided to do instead of working on a book review is share a post the wonderful Tara Lazar has on her blog. (She wants it shared; I don’t just copy other people’s posts.) Tara is the creator of PiBoIdMo which I’m happy to be participating in again –  with the hope it helps me keep going and thinking creative thoughts.

The post is about an illustrator who is contributing his talent to help children with cancer. Please go HERE to read about it. It’s really inspiring. There’s even opportunity for you to help if you are so moved.

While you’re on Tara’s blog, take a look at the PiBoIdMo page. Sign up if you want, there’s still time to get in on the fun if you’re reading this before November 8th. If you don’t want to register you can still benefit from the posts but you can’t participate in draws to win neat writers’ stuff or join the FaceBook group — if you’re on FB — which I’m not — so I miss out. (I seem to miss lots of stuff because of that. *sigh*)

As I was saying, check out Tara’s guest - Illustrator Steve Barr. You’ll be impressed, and you get a drawing lesson, too! 

Do you draw or want to learn? (I want to learn!)  Are you taking part in Picture Book Idea Month in November? (You are? Me too! :) )

Thanks for reading, and … Creative Musings!  :)

 

 

Glen Campbell’s Alzheimer’s song: I’m Not Gonna Miss You

As a caregiver of a family member with Alzheimer’s disease, when I heard this song by Glen Campbell it really moved me. (Well, okay, I cried a little.) This talented singer songwriter has had the terrible disease for several years and is in the last stage of it now. While he was still able to function well enough he wrote and recorded this ballad called I’m Not Gonna Miss You.  It could be considered funny, but – if you really listen to the words – the irony of it is so real, so painful. Glen Campbell expressed in the words of his song something most people may not even consider about Alzheimer’s – that it does not just make one’s brain forget, it destroys the brain so that memories are completely removed as if they never existed in the first place, as if there’s nothing to remember. The patient eventually gets to the place where there is no loss, there is simply a ‘not knowing,’ of anything.

I want you to hear this beautiful ballad. Please listen and tell me what your thoughts are about it. I hope you can take the time to play it a couple of times.   I’m Not Gonna Miss You – by Glen Campbell

Thanks for reading, and … Creative Musings!  :)

 

PiBoIdMo 2014 Logo Revealed!

Originally posted on Writing for Kids (While Raising Them):

Who can believe it’s almost November? I know, it was just November last year, right? And we had a whole buncha fun creating new picture book story concepts! (Need a recap? Look here.)

I’m still firming up the festivities for 2014 and will post the guest blogger line-up soon. But while you wait for that and for registration to begin (on October 25th, right here), here’s a peek at this year’s logo, created by the talented Vin Vogel, whose new picture book MADDI’S FRIDGE is out now from Flashlight Press, with author Lois Brandt.

Each year  I ask the logo illustrator to include an important detail—a lightbulb, to represent ideas being created. This year, Vin had a delicious idea! (Was it from the FRIDGE? Sure seems like it. Well, maybe it was from the FREEZER.)

piboidmo2014banner

Registration for the November PiBoIdMo online event will commence October 25th. Individuals AND classes are invited to…

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Skipping rocks – a fun video

I was talking with a friend about how sometimes similar things happen close together in unusually high numbers. What we were discussing was deaths of people we know. In my circle of family and friends there have been several since my aunt’s passing (age 75) in February — one in June (in his 80’s), one in August (age 97), one in September (in his 80’s) the same day my dad had his heart attack, and three deaths this month – a cousin in his 80’s, a former neighbour age 66, and a cousin age 65. Dad has recovered well from the heart attack, by the way, and attended five of those funerals, the last being three in ten days!

I am glad for the wedding I mentioned in my last post; it was a lovely lift after so many losses. It was a sweet, touching, meaningful event, emotional for the bride and groom … and, of course, for sappy me, and a few others. The bonus was the weather. Friday we got a lot of rain, Sunday we got cool wind and some rain showers, but Saturday … Saturday was so warm and beautiful for an October outdoor wedding at an inn by the bay. It was a day much like my husband’s and my wedding day in late October many years ago, even a little warmer. Often by the end of the month it is cold, maybe even snow flurries, but there are the occasional Autumns that have remarkable weather. Since the wedding on Saturday the temperature has turned and rain is expected for much of this week, so that day was such a blessing – in many ways.

Now on to other things. Today in place of a book review I want to share something I found that is so cool and enjoyable. Have you ever skipped rocks on a lake or pond? Have you really listened? How about when the water was frozen? Check out this video; it’s remarkable and amusing.

I have tried to skip rocks, but I can’t say I’m very good at it, not like my husband. It takes several tries for me to get it right. How about you? Have you skipped rocks? What’s been your best rock skipping record?

Thanks for reading, and … Creative Musings!  :)